Happy 14th birthday my dear Son Mark.

  I love you so much!!!
 Every year I think to myself this year is going to be easier,  this year I will not hurt so much, my heart will not ache for you as much, my tears will lessen with time, but still every year I find the pain still there…      Sometimes it is so difficult to understand how much time has passed, everything and everyone keep moving forward. Of coarse that’s life, it will not stand still not for mine or anyone else’s pain. We all move on as best as we can. However,  not having you here, feeling your absence is more than I can bear sometimes, it suffocates me,  I actually feel physically sick. I get so frustrated and upset at times when I do not have more dreams about you, I try to force myself to dream your face and it doesn’t happen. I want to believe it’s because you’re happy where you are and you don’t need to come to me so often, but I wish you would,  it’s the only way I can truly see you and feel you and pretend that you are still here with me. I know that you’re here, you are protecting us and watching over us. This summer you proved to us that you are a Guardian Angel, not just to our family but to everyone who knew and loved you. Not only did you put a protective hand on that situation but you also sent a sign the very next day that you were there, watching and loving from Heaven. There’s no other way to describe what happened except to say that it was a miracle and you were there, that I am 100% sure of. I wish I could hug you and kiss you, and tell you how much I love you for being the best little brother to your siblings. I will forever be grateful for what you did. You knew I cried enough tears in my life and my heart would not be able to handle anymore pain.  I love you my sweet boy, how I wish I could see you, hug you, and never let you go. My heart breaks every birthday and holiday when I can’t hold you. I know one day we will all be together forever . A bond between a mother and her son is something special , I always feel you around me. You are my tough little guy, and my gentle, sweet boy all at the same time. I don’t know how I can ever feel truly at peace and do life without you. My love for you is only growing stronger,


Happy Birthday in Heaven , our sweet Marchyk . We miss you so much and we love you to infinity and beyond.

Mama, Daddy, Maria, Marta and Michael.


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